Late Night Nights

Yes I know I put night in there twice. I'll explain why. So lately, I've been staying up late because of homework and bullshit projects, and the need to study for tests. But sometimes I stay up because I don't want to go to sleep. The reason I don't want to go to sleep is because I end up having dreams that I want so much, filled with romance and always so happy. But they get so vivid and I end up thinking they're real but they're not and it sucks because that's all I want is for it to be real. What happens is I basically wake up with a broken heart and a sucky reality. 

Sorry, I kinda make this all bummer and stuff but it's just how I feel and lately I've been sad. Sophomore year isn't fun at all; it's just as hard and depressing as freshman year was. I legit hate it so fucking much. I'm going to be perfectly honest here so don't judge: but I look at all these people who are dating and I wonder why are they allowed to date, because they end up breaking people's hearts and causing drama. They use and cheat on people. They shouldn't be in relationships but they are. And then I look at me and I wonder, why aren't I in a relationship? What's so fucking wrong with me that no one wants to date me? I hate it. I can't wait to get out of high school and leave this place. But that's not for another 2 years.

Sorry, I should stop before I have a mental breakdown in AP World which is ironic because I always have mental breakdowns because of this class. xD 

Sorry for bugging you guys about this but I just needed to vent.....if you guys know a boy willing to chat, you know where to find me ;D jk. 
xx
LoLo